Counseling Abusive Marriages

with Darby Strickland

How can counselors and churches recognize abuse and become places of refuge for those suffering within marriage? This practical course equips students to identify patterns of coercion, control, and physical, spiritual, sexual, and emotional abuse. We will explore how Scripture helps us understand oppression, recognize its effects, and respond with wisdom and compassion. The safety and care of those being harmed guide our approach. Students will learn how abuse differs from ordinary marital conflict and why we prioritize protection rather than recommend couples counseling when abuse is present. We will emphasize listening carefully to those suffering, helping restore their voice, and holding those causing harm responsible for their actions. We will consider how to support and protect those suffering, confront abusive behavior, and assess repentance without assuming that safety has been restored or pressing for reconciliation. Throughout, we will seek to reflect Christ’s care for the oppressed and equip his church to respond faithfully.

What to Expect

Course Work

Each week you'll listen to pre-recorded lectures, read articles and books, and engage with other students through small group discussions.
You'll complete a response paper, a community resource project, and a final exam. You will demonstrate your understanding and personal growth in the topics covered during the lectures and reading.
Your online instructor will give you feedback and interact with you throughout the course.
Throughout the term, you'll have the opportunity to participate in optional online engagements with your instructor.
Please note: You must have access to a computer to complete this course.

Course Objectives

By the end of this course, you will be able to:

Describe and apply a counseling model that:
- is based on a biblical view of people, relationships, and marriage.
- provides the essential conceptual elements for organizing and understanding oppressive, abusive, and manipulative persons in marriage as well as the relational dynamics and damages that result.
- helps shape people’s stories so they are able to see how the gospel penetrates and applies.
- provides guidance for establishing direction and goals for the counseling process for both the oppressor and the oppressed.
Know the elements of an abusive marriage/relationship counseling method and understand how it differs from marriage counseling.
Be able to interact critically and constructively with current secular models, appreciating their strengths and weaknesses as understood within a biblical worldview.
Wisely utilize tools, resources and church support in order to identify and address these destructive relational patterns.

At a Glance

course cost

$725–$775

course length

10 weeks

workload

6–9 hours/week

prerequisites

None

Meet the Lecturing Faculty

Darby is a faculty member and counselor at CCEF, where she has served since 2003. She has a master of divinity with a counseling emphasis from Westminster Theological Seminary. Darby brings particular passion and expertise in helping the vulnerable and oppressed, especially women in abusive marriages. She has contributed to Church Cares and the PCA Domestic Abuse & Sex Assault church training materials. She has counseled in a missionary church setting and has also held leadership roles in women’s ministry. She is the author of When It's Trauma (P&R Publishing, 2025), Is It Abuse? (P&R Publishing, 2020), has written a handful of minibooks, and has contributed to several other books.

darby's resources

Free Audio: Trauma as Exile

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